Finale status: INCOMING
Anyway, Pardon is not the finale. After an epic case of writer's block and something like six complete rewrites I surrendered and just wrote this up. And it's funny so everyone wins.
Next week, the season finale. As those of you who follow us on Twitter already know: MAAAAATLLLOOOOOOCK!
Wil Wheaton Invitational Poker Tournament Shoutouts
Riff Raff Theater
There were more but I lost your URLs. Email me and I'll add you to the list.
Attn: New Viewers
I put it on the About page but it bears repeating: For the love of god don't start at Episode 1x01. This ain't Lost, the episodes stand alone and the early ones are terrible, and they get funnier as the series goes along. Jump around, pick some at random, don't feel obligated to do them in order. Plus we've even changed machinima programs since Season 1. Not a good representation of the series.
If you're looking for some recommendations here are some of my favorites:
4x03 - Lodi
3x12 - What Is Love?
3x13 - A Very Joe Christmas
4x02 - April Fools
3x04 - Camping Trip
2x10 - Beardless
New episode day is Monday now.
The why is a long, boring story, but from now on there will be a new episode every Monday morning.
Also, don't want to wait all the way until Monday morning? Become our fan on Facebook and get access to the occasional special Sunday afternoon preview. It's the easiest way to not forget to watch the new episode.
The Season Premier is online right now!
Oh, and while I have you here, become a fan on Facebook for reminders of new episodes and even the occasional sneak preview if Geiiga gets done early. I wouldn't hold my breath but it's a possibility. It's a relatively new thing so tell your friends.
How Facebook Blew It
Like many people, I'm unhappy with the changes made to Facebook. But the source of my unhappiness isn't completely as a user but also as someone who's used Facebook to promote his business. The recent changes have rendered it essentially useless for marketing, which by all accounts was their ticket to a profitable future.
Of course first I'm complaining from the standpoint of a user, using an analogy about a microwave.
Let's say Facebook is a microwave. Throw in a burrito, a bag of popcorn, a Hot Pocket, cooks it right up. It's the most popular brand of microwave in the world, sells more units than anything else. Of course one day a specialized popcorn maker, by which I mean Twitter, starts getting popular. All it does is make popcorn but its sales are going through the roof so Facebook starts to get nervous about its dominant position.
One day everyone wakes up and their microwave is a popcorn maker. Sure you could pull some stuff out and reconfigure it and maybe squeeze a frozen burrito in there but the fact remains tour great multi-function device is now a single-function device. What used to be one function among many has become the only thing it does well, all to compete with a rival which wasn't any real competition at all.
But that's just a minor inconvenience to me. What the changes to Facebook really hurt was Luke and Joe's marketing model.
The old Facebook home page was a running scroll of a wealth of information. Not only was it status updates but what your friends were doing. If they broke up with their girlfriend, if they have a new favorite show or, and this is the important part, what they became a fan of.
It was great for someone like us because for every one person who likes your site and becomes a fan, at least 50 people are automatically told about it. And in fact you could go further. Through Facebook Connect, every person that watches an episode would automatically inform all their friends that they were here. And since friends have similar tastes it's targeted advertising that builds on itself exponentially.
But now why bother? We have a site to get information out to our customers, we don't really need that, and that's really all they have left to offer. Why drive traffic to Facebook or buy ads from them if there's no viral potential? It doesn't make good business sense for us, which means changing their core model didn't make business sense for them.
I understand what they were thinking, that they had to compete with Twitter, but I don't understand why nobody in their organization pointed out the flaw in driving away businesses to attract more celebrities. Even aside from taking utility away from their users, I don't understand the logic of taking utility away from the advertisers that keep you in the black.
And that concludes my rant. From now on, just comedy.
Julio Jones, PI: Part 1
So enjoy, tell your friends, and...that's pretty much it. I had to wrestle with this thing to get it up so that's all I've got.
Season 3 Status: OVER (but Julio Jones Status: STARTING)
First, as you may have noticed, Season 3 is over. Treason is the finale. But, unlike the prior offseason breaks, there will be content! Awesome content. You'll be treated to the blaxploitation epic Julio Jones, PI. It's still loosely Luke and Joe in that both Luke and Joe are in it, but it's also better.
While that's going on I'm putting together the Luke and Joe Season 3 DVD. What's that you say? There's no Season 1 or 2 DVD and all the content is right here on our web site? That may be true, but I'm making it anyway. The quality will be higher, it will play on your giant TV, and we might even offer it in HD on Blu-Ray for some reason. It'll be awesome.
Also there's other stuff I can't talk about.
48 Hour Film Festival Redux
Ok, maybe I'm being unfair to our competition. Assuming all 40 other teams were nerds just because they had nothing to do but lose to us for an entire weekend, including both a Friday and a Saturday night, probably isn't fair. I'm sure they had perfectly reasonable explanations.
Anyway, the result was Found Money, which was the requires subject. We had to include a briefcase with $500,000, a cabbie named Calvin Deedle and make it a thriller. We did all those things.
So watch and enjoy. And, you can't vote or anything, but maybe if everyone sends cash to the festival organizers we'll win. I'm not promoting cheating of course, mostly because we don't need the extra help, but send non-sequential unmarked bills to the festival organizers.
Quick Informal Viewer Survey
If you do I will answer one question you include in the email, any question at all.
Highest Grade Of Emu Oil
Of course you probably want an explanation of how weird. I emailed the script to myself and the Google ad that came up was for emuoildepot.com.
Seriously. Emu Oil Depot. That exists, and that's the ad that was served to me based on the script for the Jan. 8 episode.
I can tell you can't wait.
And of course all of us here wish all you Christians a merry Christmas, to those of you who are Jewish happy Haunkkah, to our African-American fans a happy Kwanzaa, to the pagans out there a joyous winter solstice, and to the athiests happy two days off with pay in two weeks.
Best of the Machinima Competition
We're awesome is basically what I'm saying here. Go watch the thing and bask in our glory.
Christmas Special: WRITTEN
I know I say this a lot but this is easily my favorite script yet. It is absolutely awesome. It's a combination of It's A Wonderful Life and A Christmas Carol and, well, it's the best. Ever.
But like any present you have to wait until Christmas. First is the ominously-titled What Is Love.
Geiiga Hasn't Finished the Episode Again
It's Geiiga's fault again. Direct complaints to him.
That is all. Stand by.
Announcing the Joetacular Joecember Joestravaganza!
This is an idea so amazing, so innovative, so fresh and new that I didn't even come up with it until it was already underway! This week's episode, Revenge, centers on Joe. The next as I mentioned is The Adventures of Joe. In the one after that, Joe might open a rave, I haven't really decided yet.
So I figure, why not add a fourth and make it a ridiculously tacky event? I love tacky events. I feel like a used car dealership here.
Enjoy the month of everyone's fifth-favorite character. You earned it.
3x10 - Revenge: Coming Tonight
But good news! The next episode, The Adventures of Joe, is one of my favorite scripts. It involves Vegas and shootings, though oddly enough not shootings in Vegas. Of course I'm not in it so you're going to have to look past that.
Bloody Pit of Horror IS AVAILABLE!
Go. Purchase. Enjoy.
Bloody Pit of Horror: Still On Its Way
It's a technical problem apparently.
But, as you can see from this here blog thingy right on the home page so conveniently, we're making some site upgrades to prepare for its arrival. Like decorating the new baby's room before that baby is even born, when it's still fun and exciting and not a vomit-encrusted sleepless nightmare.
On the bright side we're still churning out episodes. The one above for example, about the election from the point of view of the media. It has a Joe Biden cameo so there's that. And I'm writing a new one as we speak, despite the fact it's scheduled to go live on Thursday, because that's the level to which I procrastinate.
Why There Was No Episode Last Week and Announcement
That's right, Luke and Joe have branched out to making fun of bad movies. We had to skip a week of episodes to finish up our first riff under the RiffTrax iRiff program, Bloody Pit of Horror.
Of course the rushing was for naught, it won't be up for about a month, but it's awesome anyway and I'd show you if we had that much bandwidth. But for now, enjoy this poster: